Tuesday, July 31, 2012


saw this quote on Stephanie Nielson's blog today and loved it.

"Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones. Mothers, we acknowledge and esteem your faith in every footstep. Please know that it is worth it then, now, and forever."

-Jeffrey R. Holland

You can find the rest of the talk here.  It is one of the best talks I've ever read (or maybe just came at a time when I needed it, funny how that happens ;)  If you are a mom, read this talk.

also, I'm trying to find the best way to embed a pdf into a post so I can put some of my handmade printables on here.  Let me know if you have an easy way.

Monday, July 30, 2012

14 months

Our girl is now a sturdy little walk-runner everywhere she goes.  She loves to play outside always, now that she can hoof it through the grass and carry things around with her on the go. All of this walking, crawling, carrying, climbing has made her sweet little baby rolls almost disappear.  Also, she is obsessed with stairs.  She likes to go up and down, up and down.  At home we can just put a gate at the bottom when we are downstairs, but at other peoples' houses if there isn't something else to distract her, either Jack or I have to resign ourself to stair duty; 'cause girl might be a climber but her skill doesn't yet match her ambition, and close supervision would result in a gnarly tumble while trying to climb down.  She knows she isn't supposed to go up the stairs without one of us with her, so she will usually sit on the second step and yell for us before continuing up.

She is still a good eater and is willing to have a variety of whatever at meals, but her actual appetite has gone waaaaay down.  So much so that it worried me for a bit until I looked it up and read that a baby triples it's weight in the first year, but only gains a third of it's weight in the second year so a decrease in appetite is normal.  I still have a little panic moment every time I notice how skinny she is getting because it means she is growing up.  This month her favorite foods are: crab, yogurt, grapes, cinnamon Chex in milk, and zucchini.

She loves to push things: shopping carts, strollers, lawn mowers (toy lawn mowers), laundry baskets, trash cans, etc. and if there is a container to be found, she is right there filling it and emptying it.

She also loves gum and can chew it without swallowing.  If she ever has something in her mouth that she shouldn't, as soon as I ask her to spit it out she will do so.

She can understand a lot of what we are saying and is very good to mind when we ask her to do or not to do something.  The two things she has a hard time staying away from are the buttons on the DVD player, and the bar of soap in the tub.  She will usually laugh as she gets close to these two things because she knows she is being naughty.

Olivia is very quick to learn things, and usually only has to watch me do something once before she catches on.  The other day I was going through about a dozen of her Little People toys and noticed that a couple of them had water in them from her bath.  When I got to one with water, I would shake it to get the water out.  I hadn't noticed that she was even watching me but once I was done, she came and sat by me and then went through and picked up each of the Little People as I had done.  She remembered exactly which ones I had shaken and she would shake them too, but not the ones I hadn't.  This morning, almost 5 days later, I watched as she did it again.  She went through and shook those same ones, even though the water is gone now.  I wonder what she thinks the purpose is, or if it is just a game she thinks we play with the Little People.

We got her a small stroller today to push her dollies in, and she got so frustrated when it wouldn't go the way she wanted it to that she threw a massive tantrum.  She was so angry and worked up that she wouldn't let me hold her or nurse her and got to the point where even touching the stroller would cause her to get mad and throw herself on the ground, screaming.  If round two with the stroller causes the same reaction, we'll probably just take it back.  My mom says I used to have the same reactions to things so I'm not too worried.  We'll put the anger management classes on hold for now ;)

Olivia is terrible in church.  Like really, really awful.  It is hard for her to see other babies or little kids and not go play with them in Sacrament meeting or Sunday school, and by Relief Society it is nap time and she has hit a wall.  Jack used to be able to take her to Priesthood and then home early for a nap so I could enjoy RS in peace, but he got called to be a Primary teacher (the CTR 7 class) so I've got Liv all to myself for the last two hours of church.  We usually spend them walking around in the hallway or outside the building.  Two weeks ago I gave in and turned on Tigger and Pooh on my iphone in RS to keep her calm.  I'm sure everyone judged me, but at least I was able to hear some of the lesson.  Needless to say, my church attendance has seen better days. I don't even feel bad.  Only four more months 'til nursery!!! :)

Jack keeps a travel bag with toiletries in it under the sink upstairs.  Last week I followed Olivia up the stairs and watched her pull the bag into the hallway.  She then proceeded to pull each item out and 'use' it.  She rubbed the chapstick lid on her mouth, brushed her two bottom teeth with his toothbrush, rubbed his deodorant on the front of her little armpits, and rubbed the little bottle of hairspray on top of her head.  I didn't even know she had noticed us using these things, but apparently she had taken note of what each thing did.  It was pretty amazing.

She added "Hi" to her arsenal of words and can now give fives and wave bye bye.  I should teach her more hand gestures since she catches on so fast, but she is very selective about doing them for other people so I'm not too motivated.

Olivia is super sweet and affectionate with us and with other kids.  She likes to hug and 'hold' other babies and readily shares whatever she has.  When she is eating, she makes sure she gives mom and dad a taste, and she will usually share her toys with other kids without being prompted.  If she is holding back, all I have to do is ask her and she will hold out the toy for the other child.  She has such a sweet little spirit.


Apparently I'm in shopping mode this week :)  The HSI Ceramic Tourmaline Ionic Flat Iron is only $40 and has free shipping on Amazon right now! It's originally $300 and prices on Amazon can change at ANY time, so hurry and order it.  My CHI is still going strong, but this deal was too good so now I have a backup.  It would also be a way sweet gift for someone.
Sorry! I previously forgot to add the link. Click HERE

Sunday, July 29, 2012

things in my shopping cart today.

These fabulous travel signs on fab.com (Hopefully the San Fran one will be making it's way to my front door very soon..) click on the pic for the link
This tee
This book.  It is Jeanette Walls' new book. Also, if you haven't read The Glass Castle, do so immediately.
These wool cuffs. So cute.

Saturday, July 28, 2012


Kid 2 Kid is having a 'buy two get two free' sale on clearance items.  Jack saw the sign as we were driving by and said he'd wait outside if I wanted to check it out.  Score.  I had to do some digging, but came out like a bandit.

I love this little dress. I'm going to take Liv's 14 month photos in it today.  I try to buy unisex clothes whenever I can so that we are able to us them on a boy in the future, these little shorts are perfect.
Baby Gap pj's and a comfy sweater for her to grow into for winter (also unisex)

Thursday, July 26, 2012


1.  this yogurt, in vanilla. I bought it yesterday at Macey's and told Jack it tasted like cheesecake.  Like I could just fill a graham cracker crust with it.  This may be a bit of an exaggeration, but it is dang good.  Get the full-fat version though, I can't vouch for any low-fat contenders.

2. Liv is obsessed with shopping carts.  Whenever we go to the store, she insists on walking between my feet and 'helping' to push the cart.  We just ordered this on Amazon yesterday (look at those reviews!) after seeing it at my SIL's house. It's very heavy and sturdy so she can't tip it easily and it can't roll away too fast and dump her on her face.  She also loves putting her toys in different bins and boxes so this will be perfect for her to collect her things in.

3. Target is having their 70% off toy sale right now.  I'm a day late in posting this, so things are pretty picked over, but go check it out.  Anything with a red Clearance tag underneath is on sale.

4. The Marriott Springhill Suites in Logan.  We stayed there over the 24th and had such a great experience.

5. This album for soft, lullaby-ish music for little ones

see more recommendations here

Friday, July 20, 2012

things you should know about me.

1. I hate to put on makeup.  I will wipe on, with my fingers, as quickly as possible, the minimal amount necessary to avoid looking like the walking dead.  I also hate shopping for it.  I still have no idea how to find the right color of foundation.

2. I also am not a fan of shoes.  I know this goes against every drop of estrogen in my body, but shoes are boring to me.  If I was told that I had to throw away all but one pair of my shoes, I would be totally fine.  I could wear black flats every day...I guess I'd need my running shoes too.  So all but two pairs would be fine :)

3. I develop intense crushes on fictional characters.  Jack Jackson, Christian Grey, and Neil Caffrey to name a few.

4. When I wash big dishes by hand I put them away without drying them.  They always air-dry in the cupboard so no harm, no foul.

5. When I read, I mirror the expressions of those I am reading about.  My 4th grade crush pointed this out to me on the schoolbus when I was a kid.  I stopped reading in public.

6. I am paranoid about sharing my baby names with others.

7. I eat dessert every day.  I make sure my meals are super healthy to accommodate for the extra calories.

8. If I have a hard time learning to do something new or if it takes me a while, I get very angry.  Like full-on adult tantrum.  It's Jack's favorite thing about me.....not.  :)

9. I have a very hard time making friends and I get intimidated around other girls.  Luckily I have the best girlfriends in the world and we will be close until the end of time.

10. I hate to clean our bedroom.  It is always the most cluttered room in the house.

11. I get extreme anxiety about leaving Olivia with babysitters.

12. I cry easily since having Liv.  I can't even watch the trailer for Titanic or listen to Phil Collins' You'll be in my Heart without shedding a few tears.

13. I have tons of collectible Barbies.  Jack has taught me to leave them in the boxes.  It has been hard for me to do.

14. I can't swallow gum.  I feel like it gets stuck.  One time when I was cheering at a football game in high school I had to get rid of my gum.  The cheerleaders had been warned not to spit our gum out on the track so my best friend swallowed it for me.  That's why she's my best friend :) Nowadays if I am stuck somewhere with gum and nowhere to put it, I will kiss-pass it to my husband.

15. I  hate, Hate, HATE the f-word.

I'll add more if I think of some.  Learn more weird things about me here

Monday, July 16, 2012

sometimes I get my wardrobe and Olivia's wardrobe confused.


Yesterday: "I think I'll wear my soft purple tee today. . . . .oh. It's Liv that has the soft purple tee. Not me."

Last week:  Got in the car and wondered why I was wearing my brown, wooden watch with my black and grey outfit.  Spotted Olivia in the rearview mirror wearing tan and cream.  It matched her outfit.

Also last week: Realized halfway through the day that I had dressed us in almost identical outfits.  Orange shirts, jeans, white sandals, and we each had a clip in our hair from a matching set.  Cool :/

0 to 1

 for Olivia's first birthday I made this little video/slideshow of my favorite photos of her and big moments we taped during her first year. 

Thursday, July 12, 2012


Man.  The past couple of weeks had been rough for me.  I don’t even know how it started…yes I do.  It started with my period, which lasted two (2!) weeks.  Worst of my life.  Then afterward I think maybe my hormones didn’t right themselves like they should have because I just kept spiraling down.  Everything became so difficult.  I’d get up in the morning dreading the day ahead of me, and Olivia seemed like just so much work.  I was sad a lot.

Then I started to feel guilty.  Because who has all of the blessings I do and thinks life is hard?  I felt ungrateful and weak.  Here I was at the end of every day feeling down and worn to the bone with only one child.  Many women I know have 5 or 6 children and they do it with much more energy and grace and optimism than I do! 

At this point my self-esteem took a nosedive.  I didn’t feel deserving of a child as wonderful as Olivia because she was so sweet and all I could think about was how hard it was to be a mom and how if I had to clean the kitchen or wash the high chair one more time I’d probably lose it and shave my head-Britney Spears style.  I knew I had an amazing husband who was home with me all day and I wanted for nothing, but I couldn’t be happy and I couldn’t get on top of even the little things.  I had no energy.

By Sunday I was at an all-time low.  We were in a new ward.  Everyone had been released from their callings, which meant that I was no longer where I felt needed or comfortable and I missed the Young Women.  I felt ugly and awkward and out of place and my trouble meeting new friends magnified as I sat in Relief Society.  I felt like everyone had a new calling but me, and it must have been because I was horribly inadequate. 

This time hadn’t gone unnoticed by my husband, but I didn’t know how to voice to him what I was feeling because it made me feel so ungrateful.  I hadn’t even been praying those past few days because I felt that my problems were so selfish when I had been blessed with so much.  Who has trouble taking care of one little girl and keeping a nice house clean??

On Tuesday night Jack sat me down and asked me what was wrong.  He’s so perceptive.  It’s one of the things I love most about him.  I still couldn’t voice the negativities that had been festering for over two weeks so instead I just opened the floodgates and sobbed.  He decided it was time for a Priesthood blessing.  Many things were said in the blessing and let’s just say that I came out of it reminded that my Heavenly Father is always mindful of our struggles and nothing is too big or small to take to Him and receive His support and guidance.

I was now able to talk to Jack about my insecurities and sadness and we discussed the blessing and how Satan wants us to focus on the negative things in life and how Satan can turn even our greatest blessings into something negative by telling us that we don’t deserve them.  Jack reminded me of a quote I had emailed him a while ago that said Comparison is the thief of joy, and it didn’t matter if a woman has one child or ten, being a mom is hard work; and it’s okay for me to recognize that and ask for help when I need it.  It is NOT okay for me to focus on how hard it is though or feel bad because of it.

Wednesday was a new day.  I knelt to pray in the morning and started focusing on the good things about my day.  I had more energy and I dismissed any negative thoughts that could make me feel negative about myself or my abilities as a mom, wife, and friend.

I share this because I know that other people go through funks and it’s important to remember where the damaging thoughts are coming from and that they can only serve negative purposes.  It’s okay to think that being a mom or wife is hard, because it really, really is: in any circumstance.  For everyone.  Getting down on yourself is normal, but it is important to lift yourself back up and ask for help. 

       Comparison is the thief of joy.
                                                          –Theodore Roosevelt

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

but seriously

not to be morbid or anything, but here are two helpful articles I came across this morning:

truth and tips about childhood drowning:

how to avoid being attacked or raped, according to interviews with convicted rapists:

Tuesday, July 10, 2012


I feel like too often I am looking ahead to the next thing instead of enjoying what is here and now.  Several times a day I find myself thinking that I can't wait for Olivia to walk without falling, or be able to play on playgrounds, or tell me what she wants.  This morning I regretted ever wishing to hurry things.  I was playing with Livi's hair and was able to pull it back into a tiny ponytail.  It was sad.  My baby looked like a little girl with her hair pulled up (also it didn't help that she is basically the size of a two-year-old), and I wanted time to stop.
Also, Olivia is walking now! As if the ponytail wasn't enough to adjust to...  She is still very wobbly, but would now rather be on her feet than her knees, and even prefers it to being held (which is inconvenient in stores where she proceeds to pull everything off of the shelves, or the other day when she insisted on walking/falling through a filthy park we were at, and then promptly landed in a mud puddle in her new BabyGap shorts).

Also, we are going on a month now with Olivia sleeping through the entire night!!  I had previously let one night feeding linger, and would usually feed her before I went to bed around midnight.  However, our pediatrician told us that she should be able to sleep through the night by 1 year and I knew that at some point we may want to leave her with someone overnight.
   The first night of operation Sleep Through the Night she woke up around 1:30am wanting to eat.  I let her cry for about 5 minutes then went up and held her for a minute (all of the books say not to pick your baby up out of her crib when comforting, but Olivia just gets worked up more when I try to comfort her without picking her up, so this works for us).  It was difficult for her to understand why I wasn't feeding her and she kept trying to nurse while I held her.  When I put her back in her crib without feeding, she screamed and screamed.  I went downstairs and let her cry for another ten minutes, then went up and fed her.
    The second night I did the same routine, but let her cry for ten minutes before picking her up to comfort her.  I then put her back in bed without feeding and went downstairs, let her cry for fifteen minutes and then went up and fed her.  On night three when I went up to comfort her she didn't try to eat, she just let me hold her and she stopped crying.  I put her back in her crib and gave her twenty minutes this time before I went back up to feed her and by the time the twenty minutes had lapsed, she had fallen back asleep.  No nursing :)  For the next few nights she either woke up to cry and then went right back to sleep, or slept clear through the night.
   A week later, she mysteriously started waking up again in the night (I think teething had something to do with it).  I simply repeated the process, and by night three she wasn't waking up at all, and hasn't since.  8pm-7:30am she sleeps soundly.  It has been a dream.

She has had diarrhea for about two weeks now (sorry for TMI, but this is a baby blog. Get over it ;).  She hasn't seemed to feel sick so I thought maybe she had a bit of lactose intolerance since she hasn't been on cow's milk for very long, so I cut out all dairy.  No improvement.  I finally called her pediatrician this morning and was told that since she has been on cow's milk for 5 weeks and only had diarrhea for two weeks, it probably wasn't the dairy and that most likely she got a random bout of diarrhea and then her body hasn't been able to regain the healthy bacteria in her system.  I was told to give her a high-fat, high-protein diet and some probiotic yogurt.  Today lunch consisted of grilled cheese sandwich, chicken nuggets, and yogurt.  Hopefully it helps and by tomorrow I won't be changing a diaper every two hours and worrying over a sore bum :(  I felt bad that I had been depriving her of the things that would ultimately help with the problem (yogurt, and anything fatty), but once again it is all part of the learning experience.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

a post note on hair

The other day while i was sitting in The Chair getting my hair colored, my colorist and I were talking hair (of course).  I said something about how I only put conditioner on the bottom half of my hair and she thoroughly chastised me.  She says that I should be conditioning my hair roots to tips and that it would a) make my hair softer, b) keep my scalp from having to produce too much oil, and therefore, c) allow me to go longer between shampoos and have to use less dry shampoo, causing less buildup.  So I am here to withdraw my statement in my earlier Hair post and apologize for leading you astray.  Condition your whole head. (I still only lightly condition my roots though and more heavily rub it into my ends).

also, I know you all have your own process for straightening/blowing-out your hair hair (mine as you know is volumizing mousse, drying sections with a huge roundbrush, and my CHI), but I came across this post this morning and thought I'd share.  Maybe I'll try it :)


Thursday, July 5, 2012

one of the greats

as great as our 4th was, the day after was even better.

I love rain, it's my favorite kind of weather.  We've had a bit of a dry spell and with all of the fires lately, we've needed it badly.  It has been pretty scary to have so many evacuations so close to our house, but we have been very blessed in that we haven't had a fire get too close to us or any close friends of family.  Those affected by the fires are in our prayers.

Anywho, yesterday I woke up to heavy skies and and thick, smoky air.  I got baby out of her crib and fed her by our large bedroom window, under the cover of dark clouds.  By 9:30am it had started to rain.  For lunch we ate at the Trellis Cafe at Thanksgiving point and watched the rain fall.  Olivia liked walking in the puddles out on their patio.

I brought home one of their amazing chocolate silk desserts and while Liv napped, I curled up on the couch and ate it while reading my book and listening to the rain.

That night Jack's little sister came over to babysit and we saw The Amazing Spiderman.  I love sitting in a dark theatre, eating popcorn, and holding my husbands hand.

On the way home we picked up In N Out and ate it while watching Love in the Wild on our TiVo.

I love my life, I love who I married, and I feel so blessed to have everything that I do.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Let Freedom Ring!

Happy 4th everybody!
-filled with gratitude for our great country, freedom to live and worship as we choose, and especially to those actively fighting for our rights

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

a thousand words

I love when a photo can tell a whole story, and I can stare at it for 5 minutes because I am still thinking about what is going on.  I came across this one tonight and fell in love with it.  What a darling moment to capture, and it doesn't hurt that it seems to be from my favorite era.
ps. in the 1940's men were chivalrous and didn't take advantage of a moment to look up the skirt of their buddy's gf. just sayin'.  ;)
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