Monday, October 8, 2012

Rules for Being a 16-month-old

1. Always stand as close to the TV as possible.  The less of a neck you appear to have from behind, the better.

 2. Slides are always better when you have an Oreo in your hand.  Keep a firm grasp.

 3. Always keep your sucker safe in your mouth when you fall asleep, lest someone try to snatch it.

 4. When caught trying to go up the stairs by yourself, immediately turn and sit like you had just been chilling there with no intent of being disobedient.

 5. When gifted a ballon, you must hold firmly to it at all times.  When told it cannot be held while eating, prove otherwise.

6. While outdoors, mom's hand is a nice overflow receptacle for treats and goodies found on the ground.

 7. On a lunch date, always choose foods that allow one to look dainty whilst eating.

 8. When caught doing something creepy with your dolls, run away as fast as possible so the dog may be blamed.

 9. After a race make sure the medal goes to the proper recipient.  Namely the one who had to sit in the boring stroller for 4 miles.

 10. The queen of the house gets the big bed.

 11. When going down big, scary slides be sure to feign disinterest to avoid a second trip down the slide.

12. Guys like an athletic girl.  It's never too early to learn difficult skills like surfing.
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